April 22nd, 2010 -- Posted in Diary |
Cindy emailed us and informed us that Alicia has passed peacefully this morning. It’s Earth Day. It’s fitting that she passed today. We prayed for her yesterday at Art for Recovery and shared our memories of her. Her existence has touched many people’s lives.
Later on, a good college friend of mine, LB, shared good news that she is getting married next Tuesday. I’m really happy for her. She’s gone through some rough times in her life, but she is always very resilient and has a burst of energy and fire. I wish her love and happiness in the years to come. I hope that her resilience will guide her through future challenges having a family of her own. Marriages is not an easy thing. I admire people who have the courage and wisdom to go through life and grow old together.
Today seems like an interesting binary – death and wedding. In Chinese culture, we call wedding, Red event, and funeral, Black event. We spend a lot of money on them. Both are transitions, leaving one kind of life behind to a new. It takes a lot of courage for both transitions.
April 20th, 2010 -- Posted in Diary |
I’ve thought about what I have done in the past year. Here are a few that I feel proud of and feel grateful for in year 2009 and early 2010:
1. I did sky diving from 18000 ft.
2. I survived cancer with strength, and found lots of support!I live strong!
3. I got back into drawing again as a habit. Posted my first cartoon series. I will continue for another year.
4. I got closer with my family.
5. I passed LEED AP and on my way to get my ARE exams cracked, too!
6. I had the courage to flaunt my bald head publicly.
7. I pursued an acting class and found my interest in theater.
8. I learned to laugh unconditionally.
9. I learned to appreciate life more. The sad part, too, like catharsis.
10. I always have love in my life. Sometimes it transforms into something else. But all was a gift of life. I’m blessed and hopeful.
April 16th, 2010 -- Posted in Diary |
AFTER YEARS OF TELLING PEOPLE CHEMOTHERAPY IS THE ONLY WAY TO TRY
(‘TRY’, BEING THE KEY WORD) TO ELIMINATE CANCER,
JOHNS HOPKINS IS FINALLY STARTING TO TELL YOU THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY .
Cancer Update from Johns Hopkins :
1. Every person has cancer cells in the body . These cancer cells do not show up in the standard tests until they have multiplied to a few billion. When doctors tell cancer patients that there are no more cancer cells in their bodies after treatment, it just means the tests are unable to detect the cancer cells because they have not reached the detectable size.
2. Cancer cells occur between 6 to more than 10 times in a person’s lifetime.
3 When the person’s immune system is strong the cancer cells will be destroyed and prevented from multiplying and forming tumors.
4. When a person has cancer it indicates the person has multiple nutritional deficiencies . These could be due to genetic, environmental, food and lifestyle factors .
5. To overcome the multiple nutritional deficiencies, changing diet and including supplements will strengthen the immune system.
6. Chemotherapy involves poisoning the rapidly-growing cancer cells and also destroys rapidly-growing healthy cells in the bone marrow, gastrointestinal tract etc, and can cause organ damage, like liver, kidneys, heart, lungs etc.
7. Radiation while destroying cancer cells also burns, scars and damages healthy cells, tissues and organs.
8. Initial treatment with chemotherapy and radiation will often reduce tumor size.. However prolonged use of chemotherapy and radiation do not result in more tumor destruction.
9. When the body has too much toxic burden from chemotherapy and radiation the immune system is either compromised or destroyed, hence the person can succumb to various kinds of infections and complications.
10. Chemotherapy and radiation can cause cancer cells to mutate and become resistant and difficult to destroy. Surgery can also cause cancer cells to spread to other sites.
11. An effective way to battle cancer is to starve the cancer cells by not feeding it with the foods it needs to multiply .
CANCER CELLS FEED ON:
a.. Sugar is a cancer-feeder. By cutting off sugar it cuts off one important food supply to the cancer cells.. Sugar substitutes like NutraSweet , Equal, Spoonful, etc are made with Aspartame and it is harmful . A better natural substitute would be Manuka honey or molasses but only in very small amounts. Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in color. Better alternative is Bragg’s aminos or sea salt.
b. Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the gastro-intestinal tract. Cancer feeds on mucus . By cutting off milk and substituting with unsweetened soy milk cancer cells are being starved.
c. Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment. A meat-based diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little chicken rather than beef or pork. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful, especially to people with cancer.
d. A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole grains , seeds, nuts and a little fruits help put the body into an alkaline environment . About 20% can be from cooked food including beans. Fresh vegetable juices provide live enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to cellular levels within 15 minutes to nourish and enhance growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building healthy cells try and drink fresh vegetable juice (most vegetables including bean sprouts) and eat some raw vegetables 2 or 3 times a day. Enzymes are destroyed at temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C).
e. Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate , which have high caffeine. Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer fighting properties. Water-best to drink purified water, or filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap water. Distilled water (not the same as filtered) acidic, avoid it .
12. Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of digestive enzymes . Undigested meat remaining in the intestines becomes putrefied and leads to more toxic buildup..
13. Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. By refraining from or eating less meat it frees more enzymes to attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the body’s killer cells to destroy the cancer cells.
14.. Some supplements build up the immune system (IP6, Flor-ssence, Essiac, anti-oxidants, vitamins, minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the bodies own killer cells to destroy cancer cells. Other supplements like vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death , the body’s normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells.
15… Cancer is a disease of the mind, body, and spirit . A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior be a survivor. Anger, un-forgiveness and bitterness put the body into a stressful and acidic environment. Learn to have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life.
16. Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated environment. Exercising daily , and deep breathing help to get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells.
1.. No plastic containers in micro .
2. No water bottles in freezer .
3. No plastic wrap in microwave .
April 15th, 2010 -- Posted in Diary |
Today at our art therapy session, our theme is dealing with death and grief. I drew a girl with a kite with watercolor – a symbol I use a lot, which will be the main character of my children’s book. I just realize watercolor is a hard medium, because you have to know exactly what you are doing…Unlike acrylic/oil painting, you can cover your mistakes with another layer. Watercolor, you have to be precise and bold at the same time, similar to Chinese ink painting. I checked out some books on watercolors, going to work with watercolor more often.
A person I met, Alicia, when I started Art for Recovery Program is near the end of her life. She has been dealing with cancer for the past 8 years. She’s only 27 years old. She has a rare cancer, which grows out of blood vessels. It’s impossible to surgically remove it, because she would bleed to death. It spreads to her hip, lungs and brain. She has been a fighter. She has been writing her story against cancer on a local newspaper for a few years, which has won her a writing award. However, her condition worsened, and she chose to deal with it privately.
I was shocked to find out that her condition is so bad that she could pass away at any moment. Now all that is sustaining her life is drug and oxygen tank.  I am close to her in age. It’s hard to see someone so youthful dying. All these about her, I only learned recently – in the last days of her life. I remember what Cindy said when all of us were grieving for Alicia: “When people die, our relationship with them continue.” Alicia, you will be missed. May peace be with you!
Seeing people dying makes me appreciate the physical strength and quality of life that I have. Despite the migraines and ringing in my ears at times. Â I’m cancer free. I’m getting back to live a normal life. I don’t know what kind of health issues I encounter in the future. But everyone in some way or another would experience that issue. We are mortal beings. What I need to focus on right now is taking care of myself, surrounding myself with positive and supportive people that align with my vision, being grateful of what I have, keeping things balanced, cultivating my dreams and passions, the last but not the least, is not to be so harsh on myself – thus I can be more gentle and kind to others.
I always feel the art therapy room a safe place for me to express myself, whatever I feel, joy, sadness, and fear…I show up and sit among others and make art. Just being there makes me feel grounded. No matter how crappy I feel physically, once I get there I feel at home and comfortable. I’m grateful to have met the kindest people, who are full of wonderful spirits. Â We share good laughs and heartfelt conversations about life. I would never have the opportunity to meet them and learn so many things from them. Each of them feels like part of a family to me and has given great strength during my journey. I hope I can keep my Wednesday open so I can continue going to the workshop.
A poem Greg's ex wife who passed away wrote when she was fighting cancer...
